Tomorrow
by RussianWolf7
Summary: Mulder and Scully go to Arizona on a case. The story's a mix of solving the case and learning about Scully's past. MulderScully with mention of SkinnerScully and ScullyOC
1. Wednesday

Disclaimer: They aren't mine. I'm only borrowing them for the time being and they will be returned unharmed.

Rating: NC-17 for various sexual acts, both pleasant and unpleasant.

A/N: Lots and lots of Mulder and Scully angst. Lots and lots of unpleasant things like rape and that sort of stuff. Please don't read if you don't like this sort of thing. You have been warned. And I'm also warning you that there will be eventual MSR (Mulder/ Scully Romance) so don't read if you don't like it. It also has mention of SSR (Skinner/ Scully Romance), but only in passing.

Also, the story was named after an Avril Lavigne song, just in case you were wondering.

It's broken up by day, so some chapters are really short while others are really long.

And many, many thanks to my mom who gave me the idea. Lots of love. Also much thanks to Sally, Davey's dog, who is the nicest dog ever and sits there looking sweet so I have to pet her instead of writing.

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**Wednesday, August 2**

**0800**

**Mulder and Scully's Office**

"Mulder, it's August."

"So?"

"So I'm not going to a desert. And that puppy dog face isn't going to work"

Mulder flashed a small grin. "It was worth a shot."

Scully didn't say anything as she continued to work on the field report from their last case. It wasn't hard. Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary had happened; another reason that she didn't want to fly across the country. There hadn't been a single case that had actually turned out to be an X-File in the past two or three months.

"Aww, come on Scully. It'll be fun."

"Whining isn't going to help you," Scully replied, not bothering to look at Mulder.

"I thought that you would jump at the chance to discover a new species of plant," Mulder said.

At this Scully could help turning around and looking Mulder in the eyes as she replied, "It is impossible to have a plant that can get up and kill people. The laws of physics-"

"That's the point!" Mulder said excitedly. "It's impossible!"

Scully sighed and turned back to her computer. "No."

"What if it's too late?"

She turned around again. "How can it be too late?"

Mulder sheepishly held out two tickets. "The flight leaves at noon."

"Noon?" Scully yelled. "So you're saying I have an hour to get ready to leave for who knows how long on a trip to the desert?"

"Well, yes, actually."

Scully glared at him and stood up, grabbing her purse and jacket as she stormed out of the office.

"Scully, wait! Where are you going?" Mulder asked after her.

"To pack." The reply was icy enough to cool them down quite enough for the desert.

Mulder sighed. At least she was coming.

**Wednesday, August 2**

**1600**

**Southwest Airlines Airplane**

It was four o'clock and they had been on the plane for the past three and a half-hours, which left about that much to go. Mulder had tried to get a conversation going but Scully hadn't responded and eventually she had put her headphones on. Mulder actually didn't mind all that much because they were on very loud and he could clearly hear Bruce Springsteen seeping out from her headset.

But he was getting bored.

Mulder lightly tapped Scully on the shoulder.

She took one headphone off. "What?"

"I'm bored." As soon as he said it, he realized that it came out as a whine. _Smooth, Mulder._

It was obvious that Scully was annoyed. "You should've brought something to do."

"Can't we just talk?" That was better. Not whining as much.

Scully sighed and took her headphones off the rest of the way and put her Walkman back in her bag. "About what?"

"I dunno. What do we usually talk about?"

Scully smiled slightly. "Bigfoot."

Mulder's face lit up. "Actually, now that you mention it, there was a sighting down in Florida."

"Then why on earth aren't we in Florida?"

"Because I thought that you'd be more interested in killer plants than Bigfoot considering that the case before the last one was Bigfoot."

"In general I'd agree with you but not when the killer plants are in the middle of the desert in August. Please tell me we won't be camping."

"Uhhh . . ."

Scully groaned. "You're hopeless."

"When in Rome-"

"When in Rome you find a hotel so you won't be any more uncomfortable than you usually would be and so you'll be safe from rattle snakes, tarantulas and various other desert wildlife."

"Rome isn't in the desert."

"You'll be paying my medical bill if something happens to me because of something in the desert."

"I know."

"And the car that we rent better have air conditioning."

Mulder smiled. Finally something that he could do. "I promise."

Scully managed a small smile back. "Thank you."

"Scully? Is there any particular reason why you've been so touchy about going to the desert?"

"You've been waiting until I'm in a relatively good mood to ask that, haven't you?"

"Bingo."

"Well, actually, yes, there is a particular reason."

"What would that be?"

Scully was silent for a few minutes as she thought about how to tell her story. "Something bad once happened to me in a desert," she finally said.

"What?" Mulder asked, very concerned. He rarely had to drag something out of her and when he did, it was usually extremely bad.

Again, she took a while to answer. Eventually she replied, "It's not important."

Mulder's brow furrowed. Obviously it was important but if she really didn't want to tell him, he wouldn't make her. Not yet. "If you ever want to tell me, I'm here."

Scully nodded and turned so she was facing the window. Mulder watched her watch the sky for a while until he finally dropped off. He had, after all, been awake since about two-thirty.

**Wednesday, August 2**

**1930**

**Southwest Airlines Airplane**

"Mulder. Mulder, you have to get up." Mulder groggily opened his eyes and looked at Scully.

"We're there?"

"Almost," she replied. "Were you really asleep for the whole time?"

Mulder looked very confused. "Yeah, why?"

"No reason." Scully turned back to the window.

"Scully, what's going on?"

"Someone was screaming," she said vaguely.

"What? Who? Why?"

She shrugged. "Nightmare, probably."

Mulder studied her. She still wasn't facing him, a sure sign that she was lying. Or omitting certain truths. Mulder would've bet anything that it was Scully who had the nightmare. He also would've bet that it had been about whatever happened in the desert.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

"I'm fine, Mulder."

Mulder sighed. "If you ever want to talk, I'm here."

Scully didn't say anything. Normally Mulder would've just let it go, but he was worried.

"Scully? Did you hear me?"

After a few moments, she replied, "What?"

"I said that if you need someone to talk to, I'm always here."

"Yeah, I know."

"Are you sure?" Mulder pressed. "Because I'm really-"

"I know!" she snapped.

Mulder sighed. At least he had gotten a reaction out of her. "Ok," he said softly. "Just as long as you know."

She gave no sign of hearing him.

**Wednesday, August 2**

**2100**

**Mulder's Rented Car**

Mulder stifled a yawn. He and Scully had been interviewing witnesses for the past three hours and there wasn't one overlapping story. The only thing that he was sure about was that there was definitely something wrong with Scully. With every interview she got quieter and quieter until one of the interviewees, Laura Anders, asked if she was all right. Scully assured her that she was ok and hadn't said anything since.

At least they were on the way to the camp sight. It was only nine, but the time difference made it like twelve for Mulder and Scully. Mulder glanced over at his partner. She was already asleep. He smiled slightly to himself. Hopefully she'd feel better once she'd slept some.

_But I have to set up the tent myself, _Mulder thought to himself. _Oh well._ He pulled into a spot in an entirely empty parking lot and got out. He dragged the tent over to the nearest camp sight and started to try to set it up. A few minutes later he heard Scully walk up behind him.

"Mulder, it's almost impossible to set one of those up by yourself."

He turned around, letting go of the pole that he had been wrestling with. The tent collapsed. "Well I didn't want to wake you up."

Scully smiled slightly and Mulder let out a mental breath. Apparently he had been right about her sleeping. "Let me help," she said and began to set up the tent. They finished in what Mulder thought was a remarkably short time.

"Thanks," he said when they were done.

"Where's the other one?" Scully asked. Mulder looked blank. "The other tent . . . Please tell me you brought two."

"Well . . ." Mulder saw panic briefly cross Scully's face and then disappear. But it was obvious that she was fighting hard to keep her emotions under control.

"Oh," she said in an unnaturally high voice. "Ok. I'll sleep in the car."

Mulder walked over to her and she walked backwards until she was against the car. He stopped a few feet in front of her. "Scully, whatever happened in the desert, I swear won't happen again. You're safe. You can trust me."

"I know I can," she said in between deep breaths. She closed her eyes for a moment and when she opened them, she appeared much calmer. "I know I can," she repeated. "I just can't share a tent with you."

"We have separate sleeping bags if that helps," Mulder informed her.

A shadow of a smile briefly crossed her face. "Thanks, but I'll be fine in the car. And don't bother suggesting you take it because I'm much smaller than you and will be more comfortable."

"If you're sure . . ."

This time her smile was larger and stayed longer. "I'm sure. Now let me help you unpack."

**Wednesday, August 2**

**2130**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder was lying on his back in his tent thinking about Scully. He hated to see her this uncomfortable but he didn't know how to help her. Obviously trying to get close to her only made things worse, but being far away certainly wouldn't get them anywhere.

But he had an idea about what might have happened to Scully. It wasn't likely. It seemed absurd in fact and he would've instantly dismissed it but he couldn't. Because she wouldn't share a tent with him.

Mulder shook his head and rolled over. Whatever it was, she would eventually tell him, of that he was sure. All he had to do was wait.

Mulder had just fallen asleep when he heard Scully scream. He instantly ran out of the tent and to the car. Scully was curled into a ball in the back seat shaking. Crying, he realized. Mulder tried to open the door but found it locked. _Of course,_ he though to himself. Scully wasn't stupid enough to leave the car door unlocked. He knocked on the window.

"Scully!" he yelled.

She looked up with wide eyes that were streaming tears. She relaxed visibly when she saw who was there and wiped her eyes as she unlocked and opened the door. Mulder slid in next to her.

"Scully, what's wrong?" He moved closer to her and tried to put his arms around her but she jerked away.

"Nightmare," she said in a surprisingly calm voice. "Just a nightmare. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?" he asked, concerned.

She nodded. "Go back to sleep."

Mulder looked astounded. "You must be insane. I'm not letting you stay alone."

"Sitting next to me and making me more nervous than I would be if you were farther away isn't going to help me sleep better," Scully replied.

"Why would me being farther away help?" Mulder asked.

"I can only sleep alone," she answered.

"Why?" Mulder pressed.

"It doesn't concern you."

"It obviously does because we've come to a standstill about where I'm going to sleep," Mulder insisted.

"No we haven't. You're going to go back to your tent and sleep there and I'm going to stay here and sleep in the car," Scully explained patiently.

"But I don't want to leave you alone," Mulder said, almost whining.

"That's too bad. I'm never going to sleep with you near me."

"Why?" Mulder repeated.

"No matter how many times you ask me that I'm not going to tell you."

Mulder sighed and reached out to Scully again. This time he pulled her into his arms. She stiffened but eventually relaxed as he started to stroke her hair. "What happened, Scully? What happened in the desert?" She didn't answer him and didn't move closer, but she didn't pull away, either. "Dana," he whispered in her ear after she didn't say anything for about five minutes, "Did someone hurt you?" Scully stiffened at the sound of her first name.

"Mulder . . ." Scully replied, trying to pull away.

Mulder only tightened his grip on her. "Someone did, didn't they? Scully, did they rape you?"

"LET ME GO!" Scully yelled and wrenched herself out of his arms, backing up against the door of the car. She was very close to hyperventilating and very close to slamming her head on the door.

"Scully, breath," Mulder said, trying to stay calm himself. He was right, that much was obvious. But he didn't know what to do now. He moved away from her so they were both backed against the doors. He wanted to give her room but he had no plans of leaving any time soon.

Scully struggled to get herself under control. They sat in silence for an undeterminable stretch of time until Scully finally said, "I'm sorry."

"You're _sorry?_" Mulder asked incredulously. "What on earth do you have to be _sorry_ about?"

She opened her mouth to reply but couldn't come up with anything to say. She closed it again and smiled ever so slightly. "I don't know," she said sheepishly. "Maybe for not telling you when you first asked."

"That's ok," Mulder replied, shaken. But he wouldn't let it show, not until he was alone. "You never have to tell me anything until you're ready."

"I know." There were a few more minutes of silence.

"Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you tell anyone?" he asked.

Scully looked surprised. "Of course. I informed the police immediately and he's now in jail." She paused, then added, "Well, I assume he is. It happened three years ago and I have no interest in seeing him ever again."

"_Three_ years ago?" Mulder asked incredulously. "I _knew_ you three years ago. We were _friends_ three years ago." He was obviously very hurt.

"I know, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell you," she explained. "It was right around the first time you saw Samantha's clones and you needed me to be there for you. You needed me to be the strong one."

Mulder sighed loudly and started to move towards Scully again but thought better of it and leaned back against the door. "Never, ever, think that you can't tell me something. I'm always here for you. Even if I'm having my own problems, I'm still there. I need you to know that. No matter what's going on you can always tell me anything, especially something that important."

"I know that now," she replied. "But then we'd only been together for two years and even though I trusted you, we weren't on the level that we are now."

Mulder started to move towards her again, but again held back. "Can I hold you?" he asked.

Scully bit her lip in indecision. "Ok," she finally said and moved across the backseat to settle in Mulder's arms. He pulled her against his chest and let her adjust so she was curled up in his lap. He gently stroked her hair and didn't say anything. They stayed like that for a while until Mulder fell asleep.


	2. Thursday

**Thursday, August 3**

**0732**

**Mulder's Rented Car**

Mulder woke up to find Scully still asleep in his arms. He was suddenly overcome with an almost paternal affection and pulled her closer against him and buried his head in her hair and rocked her gently.

Scully slowly woke up. "Mulder?" she asked, still half asleep. "Mulder, what's wrong?" She had shifted slightly so she was looking into his face and he saw concern in her eyes.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "I'm fine."

"You're crying."

Mulder reached up and brushed his cheek. She was right. He quickly wiped his tears away and tried to stop crying but he couldn't. Instead he gathered Scully into his arms and pulled her close against him.

Scully stiffened, but relaxed and wrapped her arms around him. "You can't change the past," she said softly. "You can't take back what happened."

"I want to," he replied just as quietly. "I want to so badly."

"I know you do," Scully said. She had started rubbing his back, calming him down.

Mulder laughed slightly through his tears. "Look at me. I'm supposed to be the one comforting you and here I am crying."

"That's ok," Scully said soothingly. "I'm always here."

"I know."

**Thursday, August 3**

**0940**

**The Chief of Police's Office**

"This is it?" Scully asked skeptically.

"Apparently," Mulder answered, frowning at the foot long piece of vine on the table in front of him and Scully.

"Well, just by looking at it, I'd say it's a grape vine," she said. "But they don't grow in the desert."

"Do any vines?" Mulder asked. "I associate vines with old London houses."

Scully smiled slightly at him. "I don't think that there are any vines that grow in the desert, and certainly no killer vines."

"Can you send it out to get it identified?" he asked.

"Yeah, but the results won't be back until tomorrow," Scully answered and went off to talk to the police chief.

Mulder walked up to them. "This was recovered from which scene?" he asked.

"The Anders'," Chief Delore said. "Nice people. It's a real shame that Vince had to go that way."

Scully didn't say anything, but Mulder clearly recognized her typical look of skepticism.

"When can I do an autopsy?" Scully asked.

"Well, we don't have a real autopsy room out here," Delore said. "There's not much need around here, y'know. There haven't been any unusual deaths aside from these that I can remember, and I've been living here all my life."

Scully sighed impatiently. "Clearly these men and women didn't die of natural causes and in order to find out what caused their deaths, I'm going to need to perform an autopsy on each of the victims."

Delore looked uncomfortable. "Can you ship them out to Phoenix?"

"Not if you want reliable results," Scully insisted. "On a flight they could easily get knocked around and damaged. Besides, the sooner the autopsy is done, the more reliable the results."

Mulder wandered away from the conversation and back to the vine. His brow furrowed in confusion. It wasn't there. He looked around and found it on the floor about five feet away from the table. Mulder walked over to it and picked up the plant. It instantly coiled around his hand.

"Scully!" he called. "Get over here!"

Scully ran over and stared at the vine in fascination. "That's impossible," she said in a sort of dreamy voice. "That's just impossible."

"Well will you get it off of me before it completely cuts of my circulation?" Mulder yelled.

This seemed to prompt Scully into action and she pulled the vine off Mulder's arm. It fell to the floor and slithered away like a snake. Mulder ran after it, but there wasn't any real hope that he could catch it, especially after it went under a locked door. Mulder slammed his fists against the door in frustration.

"That wasn't a vine," Scully said.

"Then what was it?" Mulder asked.

"I'm not sure, but vines don't do that."

"Where'd the chief go?" Mulder asked. "We have to get into that room."

"He went to go see if he could find an autopsy room and equipment for me," Scully answered.

"Can you go get him?" Mulder asked.

"I don't know where he went," Scully replied. "Besides, the . . . well, whatever it is will be gone by now."

"But Scully-"

"Mulder, you saw how fast it was moving," she responded. "There's just no way you can catch it."

Mulder sighed in frustration. He knew she was right. Just then the chief came back.

"There's a room in the back you can use, Agent Scully," he said. Delore looked around and saw what had been thought to be the vine was gone. "What happened to the vine?" he asked.

"It slithered away," Scully said and walked out.

**Thursday, August 3**

**1934**

**Mulder's Tent**

"Want to go for a walk?" Mulder asked.

Scully looked up from her laptop. She was sitting in the tent writing up what had happened that day. "What?"

"Do you want to go for a walk in the desert?" he repeated. "It'll be cooler because it's night."

Scully smiled slightly at him. "I'd love to, but I need to finish this field report."

"Can't you finish it when we get back?" Mulder asked.

Scully glanced at the screen and then back at Mulder. "Alright," she said and closed her computer.

"Maybe we'll even see one of those walking vines," Mulder said excitedly as they walked out of the tent and started away from their tent and the town into the desert.

"I certainly hope not," Scully replied. "If we did, then we'd have to actually do something about it. I'm far too tired."

Mulder laughed. "Are you sure you want to go on this walk?"

"Yes," Scully said definitely. "I want to do something fun so I don't always associate the desert with Jonah."

"That was his name?" Mulder asked.

Scully nodded. "But I don't want to talk about him."

They walked in silence, looking at the scenery. There were cacti everywhere, a lot of them taller than Scully and a few taller than Mulder. There were rocks as well, most of which were sedimentary. The layers stood out remarkably in the sunset and Mulder suddenly wished that he had brought a camera. The sunset itself was also beautiful; red, orange and yellow light cast over everything.

"It's beautiful," Mulder said softly.

"Do you want to take pictures?" Scully asked.

"You have a camera?" Mulder asked, very surprised.

Scully laughed and pulled a camera out of one of the large pockets in her cargo pants. "Here," she said, handing the camera to Mulder.

Mulder looked around, trying to figure out what to take a picture of first. Finally he decided on a large cactus that was probably about ten feet high. "Scully, go stand in front of that cactus," he ordered, pointing at the object in question.

Scully dutifully walked over to the cactus and stood in front of it, smiling. Mulder just looked at her. This wasn't a smile he got to see very often. It was actually more of a grin, full of teeth. _Wow_, he thought to himself. Everything just clicked for a few moments. The light was right, highlighting her hair, giving it streaks of brown and blonde. The light made everything seem sort of richer and fuller. Scully was always beautiful, but now she looked like a goddess.

"Mulder?" Scully asked nervously, looking around. "Is everything alright?"

He blinked and the moment was gone. "Yeah, everything's fine." He raised the camera and looked through the viewfinder. "Move back a bit." She did. "A little more . . . Just a bit further."

Scully let out a shriek of pain. She jumped away from the cactus, grabbing at her back. Mulder dropped the camera and ran over to her. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Scully looked at her hands. They were clean. "Yeah, I think so. I was just surprised."

"Turn around," Mulder said. Scully did so and he ran his hands along her back, looking for some sort of hole. When he didn't find anything, he gave her shoulders a light squeezed and turned her around. "You're fine," he said.

Scully sighed in relief. "Good."

"Do you want to try again?" Mulder asked, walking over to the camera. When he picked it up, he added, "Uhhh . . . Nevermind."

Scully walked up beside him. "What is it?"

Mulder held the pieces of the camera out hopelessly. "I think it fell on a rock. Was it a really nice camera or something special?"

Scully laughed. "It's just a disposable one I picked up at the drugstore. I hadn't taken any pictures with it yet so you didn't screw up that badly."

"Oh, good. Then I still have my major screw up for this case left," he joked.

"Let's see if you can not use it this time," Scully replied.

"If I don't use it this time, can I carry it over to the next case so I'll have two?" Mulder asked.

"We'll see," Scully replied.

"You don't think I can do it, do you?" Mulder asked suspiciously.

"Well I haven't seen you do it yet, but I suppose that doesn't mean that you can't do it," Scully answered.

"Tell you what," Mulder said. "I'll bet you that I can make it through this case without making one big mistake."

"I don't know, Mulder. What are the stakes?"

"If I do it, then you have to do some miscellaneous thing for me and if I loose, then I have to do some miscellaneous thing for you."

"Nope," Scully replied. "I have to know what the 'miscellaneous thing' is before I agree."

"Fine. If I win, I get to pick which case we do next, to matter how outrageous, and if you win, then you get to pick which case we do next, no matter how normal."

"That hardly seems fair, Mulder," Scully replied. "You get much more than I get."

"What do you want?" Mulder asked.

Scully thought about it. "I don't know," she said. All this time they had been walking and sunset was starting to be over and it was beginning to get really dark. "We should probably go back now," Scully said, turning around.

Mulder grabbed her arm. "Wait a second, Scully. I want to know what you want."

"I already said I didn't know," Scully said, jerking her arm back. She could feel herself beginning to get upset, mainly from the unwanted physical contact and forced herself to calm down.

"You have to decide soon, before the case is over," Mulder reminded Scully, following her back towards camp.

"I'll let you know when I figure it out, ok?"

Mulder sighed. "C'mon, Scully. It can't be that hard. Everybody wants something."

Scully suddenly whirled around. "You want to know what I want?" she yelled. "I want my sister and my dad back! I want to have never been raped! I want to be able to have children! I want to have a normal life!" At the last statement, she broke down, sitting heavily on the ground and sobbing.

"Oh, Scully," Mulder said softly. He sat down next to her and gathered her into his arms, pulling her onto his lap. She curled herself into a ball and cried into Mulder's chest. He stroked her hair and back, whispering comforting words. They sat like that for a while; neither of them knew how long. Five minutes, ten, twenty, fifty, an hour. It all blended together. By the time Scully had calmed down, it was completely black with only the half moon and the stars to give them light.

"I'm sorry," Scully said softly. "I don't know why I can't hold myself together anymore."

"It's probably because of the desert," Mulder said softly. "It's ok, Scully. Really, it's ok."

She didn't say anything, only snuggled further into Mulder's arms.

"I don't want to dislodge you, but we should probably be heading back soon," Mulder said.

Scully stood up and held her hands out to Mulder. He took them and stood up. They walked back to camp together, Mulder not bothering to let go of one of her hands.

When they got back, Scully asked, "Where's the other sleeping bag?"

"In the trunk," Mulder replied. "Are you sure you don't mind sharing a tent?"

Scully smiled brilliantly, and suddenly Mulder thought that the torch lantern he and Scully had set out was unnecessary. "I'm sure," she said and went to go get the sleeping bag.


	3. Friday

**Friday, August 4**

**0720**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder woke up to find Scully gone. He stumbled out of his sleeping bag and then out of the tent calling her name.

Scully walked out from behind the tent. "I'm right here, Mulder," she said, walking over to him.

"Where were you?" he asked nervously.

"Going to the bathroom," she answered. "Mulder, you have to stop being so overprotective. I'm ok."

"I know but you know how much I worry," he replied, going back into the tent with Scully following.

"I know," she replied. "What are we going to be doing today?"

"You're going to be doing the autopsies, right?" Mulder asked.

Scully pursed her lips. "Yes," she said discontentedly. "The room and equipment are unsatisfactory, but I can do it anyway. But I knew that. I meant, what are you doing today?"

"I'll probably watch you and then I might get a new camera and go back out to the desert."

Scully raised an eyebrow. "No more interviews?"

Mulder groaned. "No. I'm not going to do any more interviews here. The stories are all different and constantly changing."

"Poor Mulder," Scully said.

"It's inconclusive evidence!" Mulder protested. "Evidence that changes and warps itself so it's no longer evidence! You know how annoying that is."

"Of course I do," Scully replied. "I'm going to go down to do the autopsies. Are you coming?"

"Yeah, but I need to change. I'll meet you by the car," he said and shooed Scully out of the tent.

**Friday, August 4**

**0853**

**The Makeshift Autopsy Room**

Scully put down her scalpel and pulled her mask down around her neck.

"Well?" Mulder asked.

"Well these people have been squeezed to death, most likely by some sort of snake. If you look here," she pointed at a pair of small red marks, "and here," another pair, this one a little lower, "these are snake bites. I've found traces of an unidentified poison in their veins which is most likely from the snakes."

"But what about that woman, Anders, who cut part of the snake off and then it slithered away?" Delore asked.

"I don't know what kind of snake these are, but it's remotely possible that, like worms, they can live after part of them has been cut off," Scully explained.

"Remotely?" Mulder echoed.

"Well that's what confuses me," Scully replied. "That, and the fact that I don't recognize the venom. It seems almost as if they have DNA from snakes, worms and a type of frog."

"Frog?" Mulder and Delore said at the same time.

Scully flushed slightly but went on to say, "It looks like a cross between rattlesnake venom and poison arrow frog venom."

"What-"

Scully shrugged. "I'm just telling you what I found. I want to send a sample of the poison to the Phoenix field office to get it properly analyzed."

"Right away," Delore said, took the vial that Scully handed him and walked out.

Mulder moved closer to Scully. "That's impossible and you know it. There is absolutely no way a poison arrow frog could get up here."

"It's what I found," Scully repeated. "Keep in mind that I'm not an expert on snake or frog poison. We'll know much more after we get it analyzed. Besides," she added, "I thought that you were always open to extreme possibilities."

**Friday, August 3**

**2200**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder rolled over again. He couldn't fall asleep. As silly as it seemed, he was too exited about what the results of the analysis might show. He was like a child on Christmas. _Scully's fast asleep_, Mulder noted with some envy. She had fallen asleep as soon as her head had hit the pillow. He wasn't sure what was so exhausting, but he figured it must have something to do with her trying not to fall apart again.

Scully's eyes suddenly opened. "Why are you staring at me?"

Mulder blinked. "What?" he asked stupidly.

"You've been staring at me. Why?"

"You've been awake?" _Jesus,_ he thought to himself. _Why can't I get a coherent sentence out?_

"I haven't been able to sleep," she confessed.

"Oh."

"So why were you staring at me?" she repeated.

"I was envying your ability to fall asleep and worrying about you."

"Well I wasn't asleep and you really don't need to worry about me."

"No matter how many times you tell me that, I'm still going to worry."

Scully moved her sleeping bag closer to Mulder's. "I know. And I feel really bad about that. You keep me up at night, Mulder. I keep on trying to think of ways to make you happy and to make you relax."

Mulder looked at Scully in surprise. "Really? You always look like you sleep so well."

"Make-up," Scully replied. "I don't know when the last time I got a decent night's sleep was."

"I'm sorry." Mulder's eyes were wide with surprise and slight amazement. "Is that what you were just doing?"

Scully smiled. "No. I was thinking about myself. I was wallowing in self-pity."

Mulder laughed and then grew serious. "Last night when I asked you what you wanted, you said that you wanted a normal life. What did you mean by that? A life without me? A life without the X-Files?"

"Oh, no!" Scully exclaimed. "I can't imagine a life without you! I just meant that sometimes I want a life with children, where I have a normal nine to six hour job and a husband. Sometimes I wish I had a typical suburbia life. But you know what?"

"What?" Mulder asked, afraid of the answer.

She smiled. "Most of the time I think - no, I _know_ - that I'm the luckiest woman alive."

"_What?"_

Scully laughed and took Mulder's hand. "I have an interesting job that lets me travel all around the country and I get to see and learn new things with every case. I have a lot of friends and my best friend I see everyday. My family lives close by and I get along very well with them."

After a few moments of silence, Mulder asked, "What about me?"

Scully blinked. "I said that I see you everyday."

It was Mulder's turn to blink in surprise. "_I'm_ your best friend?"

Scully laughed and gave his hand a squeeze. "Yes, Mulder. You're my best friend and I can't live without you."

"You can't?"

"No."

_Say something, dammit!_ Mulder thought to himself. "You're my best friend, too," he said lamely. "And I know I can't live without you."

"I know."

"You do?"

"Yes."

"Scully?"

"Mmm?"

"Would you mind sharing a sleeping bag?" Mulder asked tentatively. "Just as friends, I mean. I'm not propositioning you or anything; I just want to have you in my arms. Safe."

Scully bit her lip. "Mulder, I'd love to. I'd really love to. But I don't think I can."

"Can you try?" Mulder asked. He knew that he was pushing it, but right now he really needed to have Scully safe in his arms. It seemed like nothing else could ever possibly be more important to hold her. "Please? I swear to god I won't hurt you. I just need you. Now."

Scully let go of his hand and brushed the tears off his cheek.

_Shit,_ he thought to himself. _Not again. Why do I always have to start crying?_

"Ok," she said softly, getting out of her sleeping bag. "It's ok, Mulder. I'm coming." She slid into his sleeping bag, slightly amazed that there was enough room for both of them. Scully spooned herself into Mulder, wrapping one of his arms around her, fighting the urge to bolt. She knew that she needed this just as much as Mulder did.

"Are you sure this is ok?" Mulder asked, thinking much more rationally now that Scully was close.

"Yes, I'm sure," she said and she sounded so sure of herself that he let it drop.

Mulder fell asleep almost instantly and Scully soon after him.


	4. Saturday

**Saturday, August 5**

**0800**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder jerked awake to his alarm clock bleeping loudly. He slammed down on the snooze alarm and relaxed. Somehow Scully had stayed asleep. He smiled and kissed her lightly on the back of the head. She shifted slightly but didn't wake.

He suddenly realized something. It was Saturday. He didn't know why he had set his alarm. He knew that he would have to work, especially after they got the results back from Phoenix, but his favorite thing about working on Saturdays was making the local law enforcement feel bad about disturbing him. With that thought in mind, he switched off the alarm.

Scully shifted again and woke up. She instantly stiffened when she realized where she was.

"Shh. It's ok, Scully. It's only me," Mulder whispered comfortingly. He did eternal cartwheels when she almost instantly relaxed.

"Mmm," she replied, moving further into his arms. "That's good."

Mulder smiled widely. "Yes, it is. It's very good."

"I love you," she mumbled before falling asleep again.

This time Mulder stiffened. She couldn't have known what she said. It was impossible. Unless, of course, she meant only as friends, but even that didn't seem possible. After all, only a few weeks ago when he had said the same thing and she had said oh, brother (quote-unquote). So she really couldn't have meant it. But he had to know.

"Scully," he whispered, shaking her slightly. She didn't respond. "Scully," he said a little louder, shook her a little harder.

"What?" she asked groggily, still mostly asleep.

"What's the last thing you said?"

Scully woke up a little more. "What're you talking about?"

"Before you fell asleep, what was the last thing you said?"

"Uhhh . . . That's good?"

Mulder let out the breath he was holding. "Ok."

"Why? Did I say something in my sleep?"

"No, of course not. Go back to sleep," he said.

She did.

Mulder felt his insides knot up. He knew that Scully didn't know that she said that. He _knew_ it. But he had gotten his hopes up anyway and now that she crushed them, he felt like he was going to cry. But he wasn't going to. Not again.

_Besides,_ he thought almost frantically, _she never said that she_ didn't_ love me, only that she didn't _say_ that she loved me. So her subconscious must know that she's in love with me, even if she doesn't. Or maybe she does, but she's afraid. God knows I am. Whatever the case, it's encouraging._

Mulder closed his eyes and tried to fall back asleep, but he was too awake by now. He thought about getting up but quickly dismissed the idea. He wouldn't be able to have Scully this close to him again, most likely, and he wanted it to last as long as possible. So instead of moving, he pulled Scully closer.

**Saturday, August 5**

**0950**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder woke up to Delore's voice. He sat up groggily; he hadn't even known that he had fallen asleep. Then he heard Scully's voice and realized that she must be talking to him. The results from Phoenix had probably come back. Mulder got up, threw on a shirt (_I hadn't realized that I wasn't wearing a shirt when Scully was with me,_ he thought absent-mindedly) and went outside.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Well, it seems that Agent Scully was right," Delore said. "It's a mix of rattlesnake venom and poison arrow frog poison."

"But that's impossible," Mulder said.

"Apparently not," Scully said, frowning slightly. "I need to take one of the bodies to Phoenix because I don't want them flown and nobody else will drive them. You stay here and find out what you can. You can ask The Lone Gunmen if there have been any reports of things like this around, alright?"

"Yeah, sure," Mulder replied.

Scully looked at him skeptically. "You're still asleep, aren't you?"

"What?"

Scully sighed. She turned to Delore. "I'll meet you at your office at ten fifteen, ten thirty. Everything will be ready by then?"

"It sure will, Agent Scully," he said, went back to his car and drove off.

Scully gently pushed Mulder back inside the tent. "I'm going to Phoenix with the body of Vincent Anders. You'll stay here and do some more research. I'd call The Lone Gunmen if I were you, ok?"

"Ok."

Scully looked concerned. "Mulder, what's going on?"

"What do you mean?" Mulder asked.

"You seem sort of depressed."

_Shit. I hadn't thought that she could read me _that _well._ "I'm fine," he said.

Scully walked over to him and put her hands on his neck. "Are you sure? Because I don't want you hiding anything from me."

"I'm not," Mulder assured her._ I'm just omitting certain details,_ he added silently.

Scully sighed and kissed him on his forehead as she so often did. "Please tell me what's going on."

Mulder thought for a couple of milliseconds before leaning down and kissing Scully. _Oh, god,_ he thought. _This is . . . heaven._ For a few moments Scully didn't do anything but then she quickly kissed him back before pulling away.

"We can't do this," she said.

"Why not?" Mulder asked. "It could work fine. You said yourself that we're best friends."

"That's not the issue, Mulder," Scully said, turning away. "I have to go. I'll see you later today or tomorrow."

"Scully, wait." But she was already in the car driving away.

**Saturday, August 5**

**1344**

**Phoenix Field Office, Analysis Office**

"Agent Scully, did you hear anything I just said?"

Scully was jolted out of her thoughts and looked at the man in front of her. Dr . . . Dr something. She couldn't remember his name. She couldn't remember, in fact, anything that he said.

"No, I'm sorry," she said. "I have a lot of things on my mind."

"I noticed," he said dryly. "I was just telling you that if you could get a specimen of what this poison came from, it would be extremely valuable."

"We're working on it," Scully said, wondering what Mulder was doing right now.

"You'll let us know if there are any more victims or anything else that could be of use?"

"Of course," she replied.

"Well, until we have a specimen, there isn't much else we can do," the doctor said.

"Thank you for your help," Scully said and left.

**Saturday, August 5**

**2200**

**Scully's Motel Room**

Scully was lying naked on her back on the motel bed. There wasn't any reason that she was staying overnight in Phoenix other than she didn't want to have to face Mulder. _Why can't he see that we can't be together?_ she asked herself, running a hand through her still-damp hair from the shower that she had just taken.

Her cell phone rang.

Scully groaned and reached over to answer it.

"Scully," she said.

"Are you staying over in Phoenix?" Mulder asked.

"Yeah," she replied. "I'm sick of driving." It was the first thing that came to mind.

"There isn't anything new here," he said.

"Or here. They need a specimen."

"So do we."

There was silence for a few moments.

"What are you thinking?" Mulder asked.

Scully was surprised. "I'm wondering why you can't see that we can't be together."

"I'm wondering why you can't see that we can be together."

"Mulder, we can't, and if you thought about it, you'd know that."

"Do you love me?"

"Mulder, there is no point in-"

"I don't care. Please, Scully, just answer the question."

"Why?"

"Because I have to know."

"No, you don't." Scully sighed. "It will only lead to more pain."

"Well I think you should know that I love you."

"I already knew that."

"I know you did, but I thought that I should tell you again."

"Thanks. I really needed that." Scully bit her lip. She didn't need to make this anymore of a big deal than it already was. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to come out so meanly. Thank you for telling me again. For reminding me."

"You don't have to lie," Mulder snapped. "If you really don't want to hear any more about it, all you have to do is say so."

"I think we should finish this conversation."

"Why?"

"If we don't, then we'll go around with build up frustration and anger. Our relationship will diminish and we won't be able to be friends anymore, which I really don't want. We have to talk this out."

"Our relationship's already gone, Scully. You know that."

"Why? Why is it gone? Why can't we still be friends?"

"Why? You're asking me why we can't still be friends?" Mulder yelled. "Well I'll tell you why! Because I'm in love with you and I've been so since I first saw you! And you don't love me." His voice broke and he started crying. "Because I can't stand to be around you when I know you don't feel the same way about me. It hurts too much. It's like a knife twisting in my stomach. I love you so much and I just can't stand this."

"Mulder," Scully started but choked on her own words. She was crying too hard to speak. They both were.

"I love you," Mulder eventually said. "And I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm sorry."

"It's ok," Scully replied, wiping away her tears with her free hand. "I know how you feel."

"You do?"

"Yeah."

"How?"

"Because I love you, too." _Shit. I hadn't meant to say that._

"You do?"

"Yeah."

"So why can't we be together?"

"The government-"

"No, Scully. They aren't stopping us. Why can't we be together?"

"Because I love you."

"And I love you."

"But I'm scared."

"That's ok."

"No. No, Mulder. It's not. You keep on saying that I can wait until I'm ready for things. I'm not ready for this. And please don't say we can't be friends until I'm ready. That's blackmail and a cruel, cruel thing to do."

"We can be friends."

"Thank you."

"I'd do anything for you."

"I know you would."

"Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For loving me."

"You never have to thank me for that."

"Yes I do."

"It's not a decision I make. If it is, then you would thank me for it, but it's not. It's just the way I'm built."

"I like the way you're built."

"I like the way you're built, too."

"Scully, I'd love to talk to you all night long, but I'm exhausted and the batteries on my cell phone are wearing down."

"Alright. Goodnight, Mulder."

"Goodnight, Scully. I love you."

"No. Please don't say that."

"But I do."

"I know you do but I can't deal with it now. I told you that. Not at this point in my life."

"Alright."

"Goodnight. And goodbye."

"Goodbye."

Scully hung up and sighed loudly. She was tired. And felt like she was about to faint. That was probably the most difficult conversation she had ever had.

_I'll feel better after a nice, long rest,_ she thought to herself as she climbed beneath the covers. Scully fell asleep almost instantly.

**Saturday, August 5**

**2230**

**Mulder's Tent**

He was crying again. He didn't want to be, but he just didn't have enough energy to hold them back anymore. Scully loved him, or so she said, but it didn't make a bit of difference. She couldn't be with him; she was afraid. And, in Mulder's mind, that meant that she didn't trust him. There wasn't anything that could possibly hurt more than Scully not trusting him.

Mulder took a deep, shaky breath and wiped his tears away. He would _not_ cry, dammit! Not anymore. He had other things to deal with . . . things that he really didn't want anything to do with right now. But the fact was, ever since Scully said that she loved him, he had been getting harder and harder. And he had absolutely no desire to take a cold shower. But he also had no desire to jerk himself off. All he wanted to do was fall asleep, but he didn't think that was an option at the moment.

Mulder did try, though. He tried very hard. But his erection was proving to be an incredible distraction. Every time it brushed up against his pants or the sleeping bag, he had to bite his lip - hard - not to gasp. No matter what position he was in, it always seemed to find something to touch.

So that's how Mulder ended up lying on his back with his penis in hand.

_It'll be quick,_ he told himself. _Just so I can get to sleep._

And it was, though mainly because he was so aroused, not because of will power. It actually would have been much harder to make it go slowly. It was only a minute or two before Mulder jerked and then collapsed again, spent. He was presented with the slight problem of messy hands, but wiped them off on a dirty shirt, making a mental note to wash it later.

He fell asleep quickly.


	5. Sunday

**Sunday, August 6**

**1010**

**Scully's Motel Room**

Scully jerked awake, a fist clenched in her mouth so she wouldn't scream. Another nightmare. She was so sick of them, but there really wasn't anything she could do about it. She couldn't control her dreams as much as she wished she could.

She sighed and rolled over, glancing at the clock. Her eyes widened when she saw that it was ten ten. She had planned to be back to Hartsmith by now. Oh, well, she thought, closing her eyes. She was tired and not eager to face Mulder. A little more sleep couldn't hurt.

**Sunday, August 6**

**1100**

**Mulder's Tent**

Mulder was starting to get worried. Scully had said that she would meet him by his tent by ten, which was an hour ago. He had tried to call her, but he had forgotten to plug his cell phone in last night (_big surprise,_ he thought bitterly), so he couldn't.

He briefly considered going into town and calling via a payphone but he didn't want to leave the tent incase Scully came back. He glanced at his cell phone but figured it needed another half-hour before he could call anyone. Of course, it was at that moment that it rang.

"Mulder," he answered, praying that if it was Scully, he would have enough battery power to find out where she was – and if she was talking to him at all.

"Hey. It's me," Scully said. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving now and I'll be back in about an hour and a half, maybe two hours, depending on the traffic."

"Are you alright?" he asked.

Scully laughed. "Yeah. I just overslept."

"Lucky you. I've been up since six." Mulder instantly realized how mean that came out and added, "I'm sorry. That didn't come out how I meant it to."

"It's alright" Scully replied. "I'm sorry you didn't sleep well. Were you at least able to fall asleep quickly?"

"Uhhh . . . Yeah, I did. Scully, I should go. The batteries on my cell phone are still recharging. I forgot to plug it back in last night."

"I guess you did fall asleep quickly. That's good. I'll see you in a few hours, ok?"

"Alright. Bye, Scully."

"'Bye, Mulder."

Sunday, August 6 

**1400**

**Delore's Office**

"So what do you recommend we do?" Delore asked the two agents.

"Well, I'd say you should put everyone on watch for a green snake that looks like a vine," Scully said. "I'm not sure if there's anything more we can do. Of course, once you get a specimen, call us immediately."

"You're leaving?" Delore asked in surprise, raising an eyebrow.

"There really isn't anything else we can do here," Mulder said, echoing Scully's words. "You can always contact us Washington."

"Ok," Delore said. "We'll keep you updated."

"Thank you," Scully said. "And thank you for all the help you've given us."

"Anytime," Delore said.

Mulder and Scully took their briefcases, walked back to their rented car and began driving towards Phoenix where their flight would take them back to D.C.

"Well, that was interesting," Mulder commented.

"Yes," Scully said carefully, wondering if he was going to bring up the previous night. "I don't know if they'll ever catch all of the snakes, though. They are, after all, snakes."

"Yeah, but even if they got one, it would be amazing," Mulder replied. "A new species of snake – discovered by Special Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully."

Scully smiled. "And the good people of Hartsmith."

Mulder glanced at Scully for a second before turning back to the road. "About last night-"

"No. I don't want to talk about it," Scully snapped. "We already sorted it out."

"I know, but I don't know if you know that if you ever feel like you're ready, I'll be here."

"I did know that, actually."

"Good. Never forget it."

"I'm sure you won't let me."

"I promise never to bring it up again."

"Thank you." There were a few moments of silence before Scully said, "Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you. Even if I can't be in a relationship right now, I do love you. And I don't want you to forget that."

Mulder tried to laugh, but it came out hollow and empty. "Oh, I don't think I will."

"And I want you to know it's nothing personal."

"Yes it is, Scully. It's as personal as you can get. You've been raped and now you can't trust me."

Scully turned to look at Mulder with something like horror. "No. No, that's not true. I do trust you. I trust you with my life."

"But not with your sex life."

Scully's eyes turned to fire. "You're not going to blame this on me. I've had enough people doing that already and I don't need it from you. Do you know how hard it was to share that sleeping bag with you, Mulder? Do you know how hard it is for me to let you touch me? And you can't possibly know how hard it was for me to say that I love you. I've done a lot for you, Mulder. More than I've done for anyone else, including myself, and I'm not going to let you blame Jonah Black raping me on me. That's not fair and I'm not going to let you."

Mulder glanced at Scully again, wishing he wasn't driving so he could really look at her. "I wasn't trying to. I was just telling you that it really hurts that you can't trust me."

"It hurts me more."

Mulder felt his insides cracking. She didn't trust him. She really didn't. She just said so. And if there was anything that he wanted more than her love was her trust. And he didn't have it. All because of a certain Jonah Black. "Scully? Do you know what prison Jonah Black is in?"

Scully looked at him suspiciously. "Yes, but I'm not going to tell you because I don't want you to get into trouble."

"You can't even trust me with the location of the person who raped you."

"No, I can't, because knowing your personality, you'd storm over there and beat the shit out of him. I personally wouldn't mind, but I don't want you sent to jail."

"Thanks, Scully. Thanks a lot."

"It's for your own well-being, Mulder."

"I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself."

"I know that."

"Then tell me where he is."

"Why?"

"So I can go beat the shit out of him."

"No, Mulder."


	6. Monday

Monday, August 7 

**1000**

Mulder and Scully's Office 

Scully answered the phone on the first ring. "Mulder? Is that you?"

"Yeah. I need you to do me a huge favor."

"Are you ok? You sound kind of strange."

"I need you to do me a really really big favor."

"What?"

"I need you to call The Lone Gunmen _right now_ and tell them that I was with them last night."

"Why?"

"Trust me."

Scully bit her lip in indecision.

"Please, Dana. I need you to do this for me."

"Ok. How can I reach you?"

"I'll call you later." He hung up.

Scully stared at the phone in confusion and worry for a few seconds before quickly calling The Lone Gunmen and relaying Mulder's message.

"Why?" Frohike asked. "Did he get himself into some sort of trouble?"

"I don't know. I think so. I hope not."

"Hang on a sec," Frohike said, yelled something to someone and then came back on. "I gotta go. The police are here and they want to know about Mulder. I'll call you back later."

"Shit," Scully swore quietly before hanging the phone back up.

A few minutes later Frohike called her back. "Does the name Jonah Black mean anything to you?"

Scull felt her breath quicken. "Yes. Why?"

"Because apparently Mulder beat him up pretty badly. Mulder will be ok, but Black is in critical condition. Is he a friend of yours?"

Scully laughed darkly. "No. So they let Jonah out of prison only to be beat up by Mulder? That has a certain irony to it."

"Prison? How do you know this guy?"

"It's not important. Did the police believe you that Mulder was there?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Good. Will you let me know if they stop by again?"

"Yeah. Scully?"

"Yes?"

There were a few moments of silence before Frohike said, "Nevermind."

"What?"

"Just something that the police said."

Scully felt herself start to get nervous and willed herself to remain calm. "What? What did they say, Frohike?"

"They said that Black hurt someone close to Mulder and I couldn't think of anyone but you."

"Well he did, but that's in the past now."

"Ok. Well, I'll tell you if I find anything else out."

"Thanks, Frohike," Scully said and hung up, heart pounding. She couldn't believe that Mulder had done that. She just couldn't believe it. But maybe that was because she couldn't get her head around the fact that the prison had let him out. He had a five-year sentence and it had only been three years so far. And it was obvious that they had let him out; Mulder couldn't have just sauntered into the prison and beat him up, not badly enough that he was in critical condition.

But none of that was the worst part. The worst part was that she was _glad._ Glad that Mulder had done that for her, glad that Jonah was in critical condition, glad that he might die. And Scully felt horrible because she wasn't the kind of person who believes in revenge and takes pleasure in other people's pain.

Not, of course, that there was anything she could do at the moment other than wait for news about Mulder.

Monday, August 7 

**2300**

**Scully's Apartment**

Scully was half-asleep when the doorbell rang. She was tempted to ignore it, but had a suspicion that it might be Mulder and she really couldn't ignore it. So she stumbled to her door and looked through the peephole. It was indeed Mulder.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but I can't find my key to my apartment so can I borrow yours?" Mulder asked.

Scully blinked. Mulder had a black eye and one of his arms was in a cast. "Are you ok?"

Mulder sighed. "Yeah, I'm fine, but I need a key to my apartment."

"Did Jonah do that to you?" Scully asked.

"I need a key," he repeated.

Scully sighed. "Could you come in for a bit?"

"Why?"

"Because it's eleven o'clock and I can tell you've been through a lot today. I don't think you should be driving this late."

"I'm fine, Scully. I just need a key."

"Let me rephrase that. You shouldn't be driving this late. You can sleep in the guest room and tomorrow morning I'll give you the key and you can go home."

"Scully-"

"Please Mulder. For me. For my peace of mind."

He sighed. "Alright. But I'm really ok."

Scully stepped back to let Mulder into her apartment and locked the door behind him. "How did you find Jonah?"

"The phone book," Mulder replied.

"You know that he's in critical condition, don't you?"

Mulder looked surprised. "They didn't tell you?"

"Didn't tell me what?"

"He died, Scully. This evening, around six-thirty."

Scully stared at Mulder in disbelief. "He died?" she repeated. Mulder nodded. "You killed him." Mulder hesitated, then nodded again. "For me." Mulder nodded again. Scully walked over to Mulder and pulled him into a tight hug. "Never do that again. I can fend for myself. Promise me you'll never kill anyone like that again."

Mulder wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close against him. "You know as well as I do that I will probably have to kill people in work, sometimes so they won't hurt you."

"That's not what I meant. I meant not related to work. Do you promise me that?" Her words were muffled because she was pushed against Mulder's chest.

"I can't, Scully," Mulder replied honestly. "You know what I'm like."

"Please, Mulder. You said that you would do anything for me. Do this. Promise."

"I promise to try."

Scully sighed. "That's as good as I'm going to get, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

"Ok. Thank you." Scully pulled away and kissed Mulder lightly on the forehead for the second time in the past few days. "I need to go to bed. I'm exhausted. I'll see you tomorrow morning."

She started to walk towards her room when Mulder grabbed her arm. "Scully?"

Scully gently removed her arm from Mulder's grasp. "What?"

"Can I sleep with you?"

Scully sighed again. "Mulder, we've been through this. I can't-"

"Oh, no. I'm sorry Scully. I didn't mean like that. I just meant sharing a bed."

"Umm . . ." She was about to say no, but then she saw the look on Mulder's face. It wasn't the puppy dog face he usually used on her. It was a look of loneliness and unwantedness. Scully couldn't turn him down, not when he was feeling like this. "Ok," she finally said and walked into the bedroom with Mulder following. She climbed into one side of the bed and he went in on the other. Mulder wrapped on arm around her, pulling her close so they were spooning like they had been in his sleeping bag.

"Is this ok, Scully?" he whispered in her ear.

But she was already asleep.

**Monday, August 7**

**0700**

**Scully's Apartment**

"Scully, wake up. We have to get ready for work." Scully cracked her eyes open and saw Mulder leaning over her.

"What?" she asked groggily.

"You have to get ready for work."

"It's Monday?" Scully asked, sitting up and getting out of bed.

"Yeah. You aren't a morning person, are you?"

"Nope," Scully replied and went into her bathroom to take a shower. Mulder, who had already showered and dressed, went into her kitchen to make some breakfast.

Or, that's what he was planning on doing. The thought of Scully washing herself in the shower was proving to be a great distraction. Water running along her beautiful body, hands caressing herself as she spread soap around and then rinsed it off . . .

Mulder shook himself. This was not constructive. He was hungry and wanted to get some food.

_Yeah, like Scully,_ a part of his mind said, but he immediately clamped down on that thought.

_No,_ he silently argued as he got out the bread, _food like toast._

**Monday, August 7**

**1800**

**Mulder and Scully's Office**

"I'm going home," Scully said suddenly, snapping her laptop shut and standing up.

Mulder looked up in surprise. "Already?"

"It's six o'clock, Mulder," Scully replied. "It's not that early."

"I know," Mulder answered. He quickly glanced at his computer and then back at Scully who was putting her coat on. "Do you want to go out to dinner?"

Sully turned to look at him with an eyebrow raised. "Dinner? Where?"

Mulder shrugged. "I dunno. McDonald's, Wendy's, New Asia. La Maison Rouge."

Scully's eyebrow went up higher. "You can't possibly mean that."

Mulder shrugged again. "Why not? I can get a bureau credit card from Skinner."

"He'll never give you one."

"He owes me a favor," Mulder explained. "Do you want to? I can pick you up around seven-thirty if you want . . ."

"Uhh . . . Alright," Scully replied and walked out of the room with a small smile on her face.

Mulder mentally pumped the air as he jogged upstairs to Skinner's office. He went straight in, ignoring Kim's protests.

Skinner looked up in surprise. "Agent Mulder, what are you doing here?"

"I need a bureau credit card," Mulder replied cheerily, holding out a hand.

Skinner leaned back in his chair. "And what makes you think I'll give you one?"

"Because you owe me a favor."

"Refresh my memory."

Mulder raised an eyebrow. "Do you really want me to?" he asked. "Because, if I remember correctly, when I helped you out, you told me never to repeat it, but if you really want me to . . ."

"No, no, that's ok," Skinner said hurriedly, sitting up and reaching into his desk to get Mulder a credit card. As he handed it to him, he asked, "What's it for?"

"I'm taking Scully out to La Maison Rouge!" Mulder called as he practically ran out of the office.

**Monday, August 7**

**1930**

**Just Outside Scully's Apartment**

Mulder bounced impatiently on the balls of his feet as he waited for Scully to answer the door. Even though some small, remote part of his brain new that this wasn't a date, he couldn't help but feel sixteen again, taking his date out to dinner and a movie.

_Even though this isn't a date and even though we aren't going to a movie, _Mulder reminded himself.

_Even though you have the movie schedule memorized,_ that annoying part of his brain reminded him.

But he didn't have time to answer because Scully opened the door. And all rational thought left his head. Scully was wearing a small, skimpy, _clingy_ black dress. It came down to just above her knees and hugged her curves (_beautiful curves_) in all the right places. The neckline came down low, much lower than anything he had ever seen her in, and showed off quite a bit of cleavage. Her hair was in a bun with two curled pieces hanging in her face, one on each side. She had a little make-up on, but not enough that he would be able to tell if he hadn't been looking. She was carrying a small black purse. Mulder had never seen her look more gorgeous.

_Hot,_ the ever-present voice said.

_Yeah, sure,_ Mulder replied.

"What?" Scully asked nervous, looking down at herself before returning her gaze to Mulder's face.

"You're beautiful," he said.

Scully blushed and looked down. "Thanks," she said. "Are we going to go to dinner, or are you just going to stare at me all night?"

Though quite a lot of his mind protested greatly, Mulder said, "Let's go," and took her hand. They didn't say anything until they got to his car.

"Mulder, is this a date?" Scully asked as she slid into the passenger seat

"If you want it to be," Mulder replied, driving out of the parking lot and going towards the highway.

Scully bit her lip. "Do I have to make a decision?" she asked.

"Sort of," Mulder answered. "Because if we're going on a date, then I'll take you to a movie after dinner and if we're not, I probably will anyway."

Scully laughed. "So what movie we go to depends on if we're on a date or not? What are the choices?"

"If we're on a date, then we can go see Laws of Attraction or Something's Gotta Give and if we're not, then we can go see something else."

"Then I guess we'll have to go on a date," Scully answered, "because I really want to see Something's Gotta Give."

Mulder smiled widely. "Oh, good. There are showings at nine, nine forty-five and eleven -fifteen and Showcase Cinema and eight fifty-five and eleven fifty-five at Lows Theatre."

Scully looked at Mulder. "You really want to go on a date with me, don't you?" she asked softly.

"I don't think I'm allowed to answer that question," Mulder answered. "We're not allowed to talk about it, remember?"

Scully sat silently for about five minutes before saying, "I've been thinking. And I think that I'm being silly by not trusting you and not letting us be in a relationship when we're both in love. I'm still scared – I don't think that I'll stop being afraid for a while, but that's not going to stop me anymore. I've done things that I'm afraid of before, and I can do it again." She stopped.

Mulder looked at Scully for longer than he probably should've before turning back to the road. "Are you sure?" he asked. "Because I want to make sure that you're comfortable with this."

"I am."

"Are you sure?" Mulder asked again.

"Yes, Mulder, I'm sure."

Mulder's smile widened into an all-out grin. "That's great. That's really great, Scully. And not just for me. That's great that you feel you can trust me that much and that you've gotten over Jonah Black enough to be in another relationship."

"Thank you."

"You never have to thank me for the truth."

"And Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"It's Dana."

If possible, Mulder's grin widened. "Ok."

"I still don't understand why you started calling me Scully in the first place. You're the only person who calls me by my last name."

"What about Skinner? And The Lone Gunmen?" Mulder challenged.

"When we're working, then we use last names, but when we're just hanging out together, then first names," Scully answered.

"You _hang out_ with Skinner and The Lone Gunmen?" Mulder asked in surprise.

"Yeah."

Mulder thought about this for a bit. "So two years ago when you said you were busy on New Year's Eve and you wouldn't tell me with who, were you with one of them?"

"You still remember that?" Scully asked, amazed. Mulder nodded slightly and she laughed. "Yes, actually. I was with Skinner."

"So you two were together and you never told me?" Mulder asked, slightly hurt.

"You never asked," Scully replied.

"How long?" Mulder asked angrily.

"Mulder, it doesn't matter. We're together now so why does the-"

"How long?"

Scully sighed. "I don't remember. Six months. A year."

"_What?"_

"Mulder, it's in the past. It doesn't matter anymore."

"Yes it does, Dana, because if it was around two years ago, then you were with him after your rape," Mulder replied. "Which means that you trust him more than me." Mulder actually had quite a bit more to say on the subject, but he didn't trust his voice.

Scully sighed. "Do you want me to tell you the full story?" Mulder nodded. "Ok. The day after I was raped, I cane into work, though you probably never saw me. I went directly to Skinner's office and told him what happened. He instantly went into action and arrested Jonah. He had given me a few days off, which I told you was because I had a bad cold, and the Sunday before I was going to come back to work, he came over to check on me.

"He was so unbelievably sweet to me. I had never seen that side of Skinner before. He had brought over a movie, a very silly one, I think it was _A Night at the Opera_ and I ended up falling asleep during it. Skinner carried me into bed and as he was tucking me in, I woke up. I asked him to stay and he did. That's about it."

"How come you trusted him and not me? I tried to be sweet, Dana. I really did. I did everything I could think of for you."

"And we're together."

"You trust him more than me, don't you." It wasn't a question.

"No, of course not."

Mulder didn't say anything.

"Mulder, pull over."

"Why?"

"Please. Pull over."

Mulder did as she said, ignoring the screech from the breakdown lane. He turned to face her. "What is it?"

Scully leaned over and kissed him lightly. "Did you feel that?" she asked softly. "When I was with Skinner, it took most of our relationship for me to be able to kiss him, or be touched in any way."

"So you didn't sleep together that night?" Mulder asked in surprise.

"Less than a week after I was raped? No, of course not. We didn't once sleep together."

"Oh. Have you slept with anyone since you were raped?"

"No."

"So Black was the last time . . ." He trailed off, unsure of how to finish the sentence.

"Yes."

"Do . . . do you think I could be next?" Mulder asked, looking hopefully at Scully.

"I don't know," Scully answered honestly.

"Ok." They sat there for a few minutes before Scully broke the silence.

"Are we going to sit here until I get over my fear of sex or are we going to go to dinner and a movie?"

Mulder laughed and started driving back towards the restaurant.

A few minutes later, Scully's phone rang.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Agent Scully? This is Delore," the chief said.

"Have you found anything?"

"We have indeed. We have found the nest."


	7. Tuesday

**Tuesday, August 8**

**0358**

**Delore's Office**

Mulder had been sulking throughout the entire plane ride. Skinner had made him give back the bureau credit card and had no intention of giving it back any time soon. In fact, he had been so lost in his own thoughts, it took Scully three tries before he finally answered.

"What?" he said stupidly.

Scully sighed. "Have you been listening to anything we've been saying?"

"No."

"The nest and the eggs that were found in it have been shipped to Phoenix which is where we're going."

"Ok."

Scully handed him the car keys. "I'll meet you by the car."

"What do you have to do first?" Mulder asked.

"If you must know, I need to use the bathroom."

**Tuesday, August 8**

**1230**

**Mulder and Scully's Motel Room**

Scully collapsed on the bed.

"I am so exhausted," she said. "I would vow never to do something like that again, but I know I'll have to."

"Mmm," Mulder replied, lying down next to her and pulling her into her arms.

"Mulder, stop," Scully said, quickly disentangling herself from Mulder.

"I'm sorry," he replied. "I forgot."

Scully eyed Mulder suspiciously. He was obviously lying, though she didn't know why. "Uh huh."

Mulder's eyes were wide in his best I'm-innocent look. "What?"

"You're lying."

"Now why would you think that?"

"Why did you do that, Mulder? You know that it bothers me when you hold me very tightly without my permission."

"Exposure treatment."

"Pardon?"

"Exposure treatment. It's what my therapist does. She exposes me to things that bother me in a controlled environment. I was just trying to help."

"Well thank you for your good intentions, but I think I'm doing fine."

"Do you have a therapist?"

"No, Mulder, but I'm alright." Scully stood up and began digging through her suitcase. She eventually emerged with a light blue bundle. "I'll be right back," she said and disappeared into the bathroom, coming out a few moments later dressed in light blue, satin pajamas.

"Are you going to change, or are you going to sleep like that?" He was already asleep. Scully smiled slightly to herself and climbed into bed next to him. She also fell asleep almost instantly.


End file.
